Many times, we make declarations of faith without understanding the cost associated with them. In my own life, I vividly remember the intense amount of prayer, fasting and consecration I underwent between my twenty-ninth and thirtieth birthdays in preparation for what GOD was going to do in the next phase of my life.
Turning thirty held great meaning for me because it was at this age that Jewish men who had committed their lives to the study of the holy books would be eligible to become master teachers. It was also the age during which Jesus stepped out into public ministry.
I knew things would be different for me from this point onward, and I did not want to take this pivotal time of my life so lightly that its significance would get overlooked. So all throughout that year, it was my prayer that GOD prepare me as I began to transition from the no more to the not yet. However, I had no idea then what I was asking for.
As crazy as it sounds,
sometimes it's just better that we don't know the cost of our faith declarations. GOD does all things well, and I really believe His way of keeping us informed on a need to know basis works to our benefit. In all honesty,
if we really knew the costs associated with what we've declared by faith for our lives, then our hearts would be so gripped with fear that we would probably never pursue the path towards fulfilling that which we've spoken. Had I known on my twenty-ninth birthday what would happen to me between then and the thirty-first birthday I celebrated this past Monday, the human side of me most certainly would not have made such bold faith declarations. All I can say is that I know what a miracle looks like because I see one everytime I look into a mirror.
Of all that my eyes have seen these past two years, I would say moving to Dallas was probably the gutsiest. Drawn to this metroplex without any concrete reason why, this leap of faith represents a major cost associated with my own declaration of faith in 2009.
It's not been easy leaving behind all that is familiar to move to a place larger than any other community I've ever before lived. But GOD continues to show Himself strong on my behalf. He sends prophetic Words through strangers to reassure me that, despite my feelings of uncertainty, all is going as planned.
When I've wanted to pack up and go back to where I came from, the Holy Spirit reminds me of the calling that's been on my life from eternity. It's been during these times over the past year that I have come into a greater awareness of GOD's care for me...and it humbles me in the most heartwrenching way.
While recently visiting a friend of mine's church, it became clear that
I've been well-planted, well-nourished and well-tended to, but the pot I've been in has become too small. As great as the place in which I was planted has been for me,
this move was timed by GOD because it would take leaving that place of comfort to follow GOD's leading. This experience has taught me that
it takes leaving everything you know to REALLY find out what it means to rely on GOD. In order to ensure I'm prepared for the next phase, I've had to make a conscience decision to submit to this uncomfortable season. GOD has to make sure that my trust is in Him and that He has my total allegiance.
No more "my way" but "His way" because I cannot expect to fulfill the purpose for which GOD gave me life by making decisions based upon my own understanding. For this is where, in the walk of faith, where the rubber meets the road and it's time to get moving.